Book written by Sarah Weeks, published 2004.
Heidi’s way of life is very different from your average twelve-year-old. She doesn’t go to school, she doesn’t have hardly any friends her own age, and she uses her impossible lucky streak to earn a living at the slot machines around Reno. Heidi’s mentally-disabled mother and Bernadette, their agoraphobic neighbor and primary caregiver, rely on Heidi to provide some stability to their cozy cocoon of life. And for the most part, Heidi is happy to do just that. But the thing about having a mother whose vocabulary only consists of twenty-three words is that Heidi knows next to nothing about her origins. And when “soof” is the only of those twenty-three words with no definite meaning but clearly greater significance, Heidi slowly feels her cocooned life morph into a cage. Determined to discover her family’s history and the object of her mother’s mysterious word, Heidi embarks on a cross-country quest that will teach her more about herself than she ever expected to find.
I first discovered this novel back in elementary school. I didn’t really understand a lot about the themes or the weight of Heidi’s inner turmoil back then, but I’ve held onto this book throughout the years because of the importance of words it emphasizes. Even as a kid, I was intrigued by “soof” and the idea that some people just made up words, and those words were valuable to them. Now that I’m older, reading this book again got me thinking about the diversity of words and how a single word can mean something different to a hundred different people. This novel reminds me of the power of language, and as an English major, I really appreciate books like this. Because I’m a total nerd.
I think this is one of those books that everyone should read at least once—who knows? It may give you a fresh perspective on something you don’t think a lot about.
This book is really clean. No swearing, no violence, or intimacy. The only two things to really be aware of are that Heidi does illegally gamble (only out of necessity) and another mentally disabled character has a tantrum and bangs his head against the wall (off-screen).
Spoiler alert! Unless you know what “soof” is, I wouldn’t recommend reading ahead!
"Another thing I found out right around the same time is that not knowing something doesn't mean you're stupid. All it means is that there's still room left to wonder."
Going back to the idea of diversity in words, I got thinking about that idea because “soof” was a nickname for Heidi’s mom, but it was a word that meant “love” in that relationship. It goes back to the concept that Heidi and Thurman Hill each brought up: Just because Sophia and Elliot didn’t have the words to express themselves didn’t mean that they didn’t feel as deep a love as anyone else feels. It reminds me of The Fault in Our Stars and how “okay,” for Hazel and Gus was a promise, like “always”. I love that individual words can have dozens of different meanings if we listen to how other people use them. They become like pictures that way, and it’s just another great perspective on language.
As much as I like the emphasis this novel places on words, I found a greater appreciation for the profound wisdom in the theme this time around. Weeks writes a strong story about pursuing answers to our life’s greatest questions. The journeys we take to discover our roots or even just ourselves can be some of the most rewarding. But sometimes, there are things we just can’t know. Like Heidi says, no matter how much research we do, there’s no way to tell what color the dinosaurs were. And in either scenario, there has to be a level of acceptance because whether we know something or not, there are some things that can’t be changed. The only thing that changes is us. Knowledge changes our understanding of what was so that we can better shape what will be. I don’t know. I think it’s a really well-written level of wisdom for younger readers.
What do you think? Are you one of those people that will travel for the truth, or is it better to let some knowledge stay mysterious?
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